Setting as Part of Story

You want readers to feel like they’re in the world of your story. When the character enters a place, you want the reader to feel like they too have entered that place.

How you do this would seem fairly straightforward. You describe everything the character sees and hears and smells and tastes and touches, right?

But you may have noticed that while description of setting in a good book is immersive and entertaining, when you write something like that in your own story it can often feel longwinded and unengaging.

You paint a clear picture of the world but it’s like you’re not actually in the picture, you’re just viewing it from a distance. So how do you close that gap so the reader is pulled into the setting rather than skimming over it?

This is particularly an issue at the start of a story. Once things are moving it becomes a lot easier to engage the reader and this offers a clue to what is often missing.

If I walk into a room and describe it, you will have an idea of where I am but there’s no reason why you should care or be that interested. If I walk into a room with the intention of finding a hidden key I need then my description of the room will be within the context of what I’m looking for. Not only will that create an added level of interest for the reader, it will also give me a guideline with regard to exactly what things I describe.

Setting is not so much about the objective reality (what happens to be in a room) as it is about subjective need (what the character is experiencing).

In the middle of a story those sorts of goals and motivations have usually already been established so things flow a lot easier, although it can still sometimes get away from a writer. Endless descriptions of everything is usually a sign of a writer stalling for time.

The first thing to take into account with any setting is why is the character here?  Once you know that, once you know what it is the character wants, then it becomes much easier to shape the world around those needs.

If a guy walks into a gym locker room, describing the sights and sounds, the smell of sweat mixed with deodorant, the steam in the air, will all be relevant to the experience but they aren’t necessarily relevant to his experience. Why is here?

If he’s here to confront someone then maybe he’s sizing up the men in various states of undress and whether they’re going to be a problem.

If he’s here to plant a bomb then maybe he’s checking out the construction and emergency exits.

If he’s here to buy drugs from a dealer maybe he’s noticing how strong and healthy everyone looks and how weak he feels. 

If he's here to workout, then you may need to dig a little deeper. Does he want to impress a girl? Feeling a bit insecure about his body? How would that insecurity affect the way he views the locker room?

When you narrow the perspective you still allow for description of setting, but you also build momentum that keep things moving.

However, it isn’t always that simple. Sometimes the character has no particular reason to be where they are, it’s just part of their routine. The kid goes to school, the man drives to work, the woman sits in her office. The writer wants to introduce the world as it is before the plot kicks off.

The thing to remember is that just because the main plot isn’t driving the character that doesn’t mean nothing is. Even in the mundane world people want things. The kid is trying to avoid bullies and has a special route from one class to another. The man in the car has a trick to get a parking space that requires him to fool a security guard. The woman has her eye on the corner office that’s occupied by her rival.

All these things will influence how they see their environment. It may not be immediately obvious what their ultimate goal is but the sense that there’s more to the way they see things than simple general description will come through.

Even when a character doesn’t yet know what he’s here to do or he thinks he’s here for one thing and it turns out to be something else entirely, in the character’s mind he’s here for his own reasons. It doesn’t matter what the goal is, and in some cases it gets forgotten once the main plot takes over, but that meshing of description in the service of a goal is what captures a reader’s attention.

All you need to know is what the character is here to do, and then focus on what they would notice while attempting to do it.

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